finding my compass

so i tell my dad "I got a job offer!"
"I didn't think you would be that together"
automatic deflation

how is that I am so
I am so surprising...about the most responsible things

now I know that I actively avoided my life for quite a while
I am happy with my new job, I know that'll be the oppurtunity I've been looking for
My boss is dedicated, tenacious, and incredibly experienced
the staff of the the south lorain community inatiative cosnsists of two, me and my boss
in the community center of 15 agencies
my job is funded by a siezable grant form several state and federal agencies. i am lucky to be chosen

I am a lucky one


duckring, depending if she takes he position in Spain, will be leaving me soon.
christi needs to stay put, and the same for kate
jason is in philly still and januzzi ran away to NYC, along with the growing number of loves(dryden, jess, jord, sam, cito, jiamito)
I will go out east
januzzi and i would talk of living together - now i wish that i was financial responsible
in a year there will be a a great Sara Mari migration






ps
Big is a fucking fantastic movie

much to be anticipated!

so christ-i-kins and I have decided to collaborate in the blogsphere. the topic and tone are concise: humorous and current events. yea, it'll be us and about a hundred thousand other blogs with the same format. no fear, eventually we will be media whores and everyone will read our words!!!!

updates will come for sure!


in other news i am to return to the city of steel and polluted water for the much anticipated Flores family reunion. I am pretty stoked for this occassion. not only will immediate brood ( the Flores family break down: seven brothers, four sisters, and the parents) but the Delgado, Amador, and Garcia cousins will be in attendence! According to my Uncle David, the reunion mastermind, there should be 5 tequila shots per adult and 5-6 cups of modelo from a keg!!! hell yea, mexican-american dreams do come true!

Birthday Celebrations!!!!!

Today, my youngest sibling celebrated his fifth birthday! He's such a big boy now!!!

Teo a little over four years ago:

Teo, Big Boy style (he demands that you bow down to his Big Bioy-ness!!)




































*In two days the quarter century mark for Sara Mari goes down!*

let's run and never look back!!!

ANARCHY ANIMALS!! Breaking out of a Zoo near YOU!

the get panda escape stolen from christi-kins



http://view.break.com/323832 - Watch more free videos

Thank you McSweeny's for so accurately describing my college era efforts

the silver anniversary

my birthday month has commenced, and to illustrate my burgeoning maturity:

I have taken a job as a server to tie me over financially until I either get an Americorps position or give in and take this job my dad has lined up for me. I am now a server in training at Martini's Italian Restaurante. Everyday I, as every trainee has to, shadow a different position in the restaurante. So far I've bussed, served twice, and worked on the salad line in the kitchen. Most of the kitchen staff is from Latin America, mostly Guatemala or Mexico.

Thursday I am on the salad line with Fredrico and Pompu, or at least that's what I that he told me his name was and he has yet to correct me. During my two hour stint has a terribly slow salad maker, I flex my spanish skills and talk to Fredrico and Pompu. Fredrico responds to me to most and is quite possibly the tallest Mexican I've seen in several years. Congenial conversation ebbs in between my constant "Que?"' and "repita por favor" since they speak a notch above whispher and we are surrounded by industrial fridges, a dishwasher, and the general kitchen hub-bub.

Fredrico starts asking more questions: do I like video games, which ones?, do I like movies, do I like to dance? I think nothing of the last question and expound in great the dances i know (salsa, merengue, bachata) and my favorite musicians and then I start freaking out about the blue cheese that won't sprinkle on the salad I am making, it just goobs and oozes on my hand. Somewhere in between me giving table 52 a 3oz chunk of cheese and Pompu staring at me for making a scene over the cheese, Fredrico asks me to go dancing with him. No he asks "te gusta a baliar conmigo" "Do you want to go dancing with me?". So specific and to the point. I go, "Que". Immediately in my head i freak out. Freak out. There's no sound reason to the freak out, thats just what happens in my geared-up head. He repeats and suddenly I am deaf. completely and totally deaf to english or spanish for several more cycles of "que" until I am granted with an end. I feel my cheeks burning and the tops of my ears are red. I think that a mature woman of twenty five can say, "I don't know you well enough yet to go out with you" (while in my head continuing with "during the evening in a city that I don't know where you could easliy drug me, rape me and kill me". Then I would scold myself for letting my mother's constant paranoia finally sink its teeth into my consciousness.). No, i feign a sudden ignorance to spanish and all languages for that matter.

Later, as I finish up my salad shift and suddenly recover my language abilities enough to bid Pompu and Fredrico "Adios", I walk to my stepdad's car, that I was using since I am carless, replaying the whole scene. "Yeah, that's me the twenty five year old", I chide myself at the whole thing, Fredrico, the job, my stepdad's car.

when am I my own permanent address?

i have a problem with loving.
it's early, i know, i know.
i love back and forward and i know my impediment
i love to selfishly.
a reciprocal love repells me
i know my problem
it is costly to love reciprocally
so, so, so easy
for me to love a lovely boy
without a possibilty of reciprocation
dangerously easy

Oh me, oh my

ok, so my diligence has paid off, and now i feel comfortable proclaiming my Blogger saviness!
so following blogger directive here i am, love me!